April, 15 - 20
As usually nothing very interesting happened. I wake up every morning, I go to school, I try not to overexert myself with homework unless there is no other possibility to duck out. Most of my evenings are long conversations through the internet with Tom, who is from California and is my fiancé. Meantime I read my emails and I check web sites. I sleep too much! I have a very nice life if you don't count the work output. It is not that I am lazy or I don't work at all, but the things that command my attention are not exactly connected with my school or grades. Well, this is just me...
Saturday, April 21
I got up at 2 pm. This is my new, sick timetable, which I made for myself.
I stayed in bed very, very long hours during the weekend. It is hard for me to say what was the reason or for how long I was lying but one thing is for sure it was absolutely abnormal. I don't sleep all night (e.g. till 3 am or even till 5 or 6 am) and than I wake up in the afternoon (usually 2 or 3 pm). But this is my normal - all night - lifestyle; mostly on weekends.
Sunday, April 22
This is a day that belongs to my mum and Sara. I wanted to spend it somewhere else than city. So we all decided to go to Bush Gardens. I was made to go on Gwazzi time after time. After each ride, and there was four of them, I was wondering if there is everything fine with me? Did I spend 50 $ for being scared? That is crazy!
I must say it was a great day. We had a lot of time and a good laugh (except for Gwazzi).
Monday, April 23
I got up very early, at 10 o'clock. I had an appointment with a doctor for my daughter, who was going on a Girl Scout Camp. After examination we went out for lunch. We were in hurry because of my school and that is why I didn't cook anything.
At the evening I phoned my fiancé through the internet. I found very good software called "PALTALK", the long distance calls are for free. Now I know that when I heard him for the first time I fell in love with his voice... it is so deep and pleasing to the ear. There are no words to express it.
But this was not the only thing I did - I had to do my homework, too.
Tuesday, April 24
I was sleeping till 1 pm what means that I didn't go to my classes, actually I had just one. I finished my school about 10 pm yesterday. I was studying and talking with Tom at the same time. I went to bed at 4 am and I found out that I can't fall asleep. I stayed awake till 7 or 8 am so there's no wonder I couldn't get up for the only class I had today. It's nothing important and I don't care for that class. (However, I always feel sorry when I am absent from school, fortunately that was just one lesson which doesn't look that bad!)
One thing is for sure I must study for the exam. A month and a half is gone and I have got just 7 days left till the exam and I haven't even read one page from my book. I have made a resolution to read one chapter weekly or even more but it would depend on my time.
That'll be all for today.
Wednesday, April 25
The motto for today is :" More thinking". I was late for my classes again. At first I blamed Tom for that but I don't know why, he had nothing to do with that. I feel very bad when he is sad. It makes me feel the same way. And yesterday he was sad. I tried to find out what was the reason but he didn't want to tell me and that made me very angry. But sometimes it is like that, you just don't feel like talking to anybody. I felt very sorry that I put a pressure on him instead of just being with him. And today, I woke up too late and I blamed Tom for that. It was very unfair. I must check if I am sane or maybe it would be good for me to start studying some psychological books online. Maybe than I would understand what is in my head?
I love you Tom, I am really grateful for everything, for listening...
Thursday, April 26
OK. It is high time I did my homework from the online courses. It looks that I am a little behind in my assignment. I promise to do a half of it now and the rest of it tomorrow.
I wish I could be more thorough and systematic in my work. I think it would make my image look more attractive.
Well, on second thoughts, is it that important?
This is me, my lifestyle, should I pretend that I am somebody else?
If other people doesn't like the way I am, it is not my problem.
I know that I can work really hard but there must be something interesting to do, e.g. the computer. If there is any problem with it, I will look for the solution as long as necessary. I will do anything to find the answer and I can learn so many interesting things than. On the other hand, I hate swotting for exams. It doesn't make sense, I won't remember anything after test. So why should I learn all of that by heart and worry about the results?
What's the point of it?
Friday, April 27
I got up late ( around 11 am) that is why I haven't got time for writing today. I need to make a good use of time as my daughter is away. I can do my schoolwork. When she is at home everything is centered around her. She holds the attention of our dog, two cats and of course mine, too. She won't let us free until dusk. Only when she goes to sleep I can take care of myself, talk with Tom, work on my computer.
Having a baby is very demanding.
She keeps on asking about so many things, where am I to find all those answers?
